Giantskins

So if you see a talk awkward guy with weird facial hair on the Giant's sideline's tonight, chances are you're looking at Plaxico Burress. But if you happen to notice his white-boy equivalent flicking boogers, well, that's probably me.

I'm actually not a Giants fan, but alas, connections have allowed me the distinct pleasure of attending many a Giants game from the sidelines and front rows. This is always a bit of an awkward predicament. It's like visiting a friend at their college, or moving to Canada. You don't want to be a Negative Nancy in such a position, but at the same time, I've already pledged allegiance to another team (the New York Bretts). Sorry. It's in my blood.

So I politely clap. I make offhand comments to staff members. I obnoxiously text my friends in other parts of the stadium to show them where I am. It's not a bad gig, and I hope to continue attending Giants games in the future. Just know, you're not going to catch me in an Eli jersey anytime soon.

Let's take a quick look at some of the impact players for tonight's NFL kickoff:

Quarterbacks: Jason Campbell has struggled in the preseason picking up Jim Zorn's complicated new offense. Luckily, he'll have extra time to think about it, as the Giant's are obviously missing their two biggest guns on the D-line. Still he won't get very far. (ETC predication: 14/23, 180yds, 0TD, 2INT). Meanwhile, Mr. Eli looked sharp in the preseason, which is meaningless. Luckily, the 'Skins are missing a D-linegun of their own in Jason Taylor, and Shawn Springs is hurting. Giants WR's are hurtin' and that make me nervous. Let's give 'lil bro a somewhat decent game anyway: 19/27, 240yds, 2TD, 1INT, and a fumble lost.

Running back: Should be interesting to see how Coughlin's splits the carries. Brandon Jacobs (ETC: 12 carries, 60yds, 1TD) will get the bulk the of carries, but Ahmed Bradshaw and Derrick Ward should steal enough yardage to prevent him from being a frontline fantasy starter. Personally, if you have a solid backup, I'd wait it out this week to see how the Giants handle things. Meanwhile, Clinton Portis should have a field day. Look for the Redskins to pounds the ball until they get the passing game figured out. (ETC: 25 carries, 125 yards, 1TD).

Wide Recievers: When is Santana Moss going to come around? When is Antwaan Randle El going to come around? It seems like these recievers excel best on other teams. They need a third reciever, and rookie Devin Thomas should provide that help... someday. They'll look for him in the end zone. Meanwhile, Plaxico claims his right ankle his okay, and that the Giants recieving core is dope. They aren't, but he'll burn Shawn Springs for a touchdown tonight.

Defense: They'll both be solid picks. It's early in the season, and both offenses are either inexperienced ('Skins) or hurting (Giants).

Kickers: Props to whoever starts the 44-year old John Carney. Redskins red-zones woes should help Shayne Graham.

ETC Final score: Giants 24, Redskins 16